A guy ceding part of his “man cave” to his wife? Well, yes since both members of a couple can have fun it it.
The game room upstairs is my favorite room in the house. Before I met you, it was simply my own room for my “toys.” The shelves were full of the hundreds of books and games I had accumulated since I was a kid. The two 4×8 tables always had a game set up on them and some book related to it was spread out nearby. Pictures that I liked, especially the one with my relative flying his B-17 in 1943, adorned the walls. And finally the air-hockey table my mom and dad gave my sister and me when I was 15 was there along with the big leather chair from my dad’s office in Fort Worth. I was surrounded with things that I liked and also by things that related to my family and the memories about them. It was indeed my kingdom in more than one way.
And then you came along. I remember on our first date I showed you “The Sanctum” as I called it. I think you were a bit surprised by its contents. Strangely, you had seen a wargame before at a garage sale. Too bad we weren’t going together then since it sounded like the old man selling his wargames had some games worth some money. If you had called me about it, I would have immediately gone to his house in Lake Country and scooped up the goodies to resell them. But that little fantasy was not to be. Something different would arise. The Sanctum would become our playroom—not just mine.
After we moved you in, we put away some of my stuff, and I ceded part of The Sanctum to you for your bead work. Before then, you had your hobby things on your dining table downstairs. I realized that I really didn’t need both tables, and I could box up some of my books to make room for your hobby delights.
And that I did. Soon we were both up there; you stringing beads and me pushing cardboard counters over maps in my paper wars. For a long time, we did that on many days of the week after dinner and work. After we went walking or played disc golf, we exercised our minds in The Sanctum. What had in the past been just my “Holy Of Holies” was now your shrine for enjoyment as well.
And enjoy it we did—even making love on the floor by one of the tables one night when we were feeling somewhat frisky. Certainly, we did like being up there in more than one way. It was a good place to be where we could pursue our own interests and yet be together as a couple. That was a good thing. Many couples are so into doing things alone; they forget what it is like to be a couple.
It seems a sad thing that every couple does not have a room or place to share things together, and at the same time, do things they alone savor and enjoy. If every couple had their own joint Sanctum, they could savor the best of those worlds, just as we did for awhile up there as two individuals.