Almost Married One Year

This is from “Notes to Stephanie: Middle Aged Life Letters And Life Stories”. It was written when we had been married a little short of one year and were looking back over the events of those hectic and sometimes troubling past few months. It has the recognition of the past hard times and also the hope of better things to come.

Yes dearest, we are about to be married for an entire year. And what a busy year it has been. We have, and still are, blending our two households, dealing with our brood of kids and their growing up trials and tribulations, and of course getting to know each other better each day. Yes indeed we HAVE been busy. And it seems the “to do” list is not getting any shorter. But that is OK I guess, I think most people do not have lives that are without events and tasks.

But back on being married for a year my love. Looking back over the time since we met, our lives are very different than they were. Certainly that is a statement of the obvious, how could our lives be the same after being wed? They couldn’t, they had to change. It has become something new for us, and for our families too even though in some cases they show angst or other emotions that to us are alien given the fact that we are together due to our love for each other. If two people receive ill-will due to a positive thing like true love, what on earth would they get if their reason for being together were less than good or usurious? I don’t want to know actually, our lives as they are seem to be complicated enough some days. In the end, life did mutate into another organism, a different species of existence regardless of what form others outside of our orb thought we would, or should, possess.

And this pattern of change will continue. As we are together our lives will change more over the years, much of the time due to people outside of our doors and events outside of our control. But also due to how we keep learning to understand each other and live with each other. Even when we have fussed, we have learned something positive as a result. And when we don’t fuss we certainly also gain knowledge about the other as well.

So more years will pass being together my Stephanie dear; I look forward to them even though we will be getting old for sure. That is OK too, we will enjoy each other’s company as we enter into the twilight of our own lives even as our four kids enter into the prime of their own. This is the natural order of things; this is how it should be. We will move across the horizon of our own distant wedding anniversaries yet to come and unseen over time, one after another each year we are one. And we will be changed by our travels through life together. Changed into something better, and greater, than what we are now.

Jeff To Stephanie July 17, 2007


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