Kids leaving the nest and finding their own way is something I write about a lot. Here is another Note covering that topic from “Notes To Stephanie: Middle Aged Love Letters And Life Stories”.
Our kids, our kids, our kids. Just in this week so far we have some adventures with them right? From the 5:30AM call from Son about your daughter to my daughter’s pleasant visit we have experienced an array of things have we not? Such swings of things are par for the course aren’t they? Or is it fate or just chance? Who knows, it is what it is. Such things will transpire at this stage in our lives as our kids grow up. Certainly we should be prepared for more of such things I would say.
It just goes to show that we are spectators as we have discussed many times. And it shows that as time goes on, things will many times straighten themselves out. Or turn the other way too. Or still seethe in the background. In the end, with four kids becoming young adults, there will be many things that will surprise us over the next several years. Some will please us, some will try us, and some will no doubt sadden us too. As we think back about our own lives, certainly we caused the same reactions ourselves. Such stuff is the nature of maturing I say.
So what do we do in reaction to these things? As I said we are mostly spectators, we can’t do much even if we wanted to about how our kids live their lives. Nor should we really. They are adults now, well most of them anyway, but regardless they are free to choose how to live their lives and proceed with their existences without our approval or supervision. Of course, they should accord us the same thing. God forbid, their parents can have lives and love too? Surely not they might say. Surely we can live our life too I say my dear. We can still care for our kids and at the same time love them, help them, and be good to them.
Certainly, this is not a contradiction. Certainly, this is how it should be as our nest is emptied and our little birds fly off to who knows where on their own. What is not certain is where our nestlings will themselves build their own nests. What tree, or in what forest, they will someday land on is unknown. Over time they will have to visit our little nest and let us know won’t they? Maybe bringing their own little noisy hatchlings to see us two old birds as our feathers get grayer.
Jeff To Stephanie June 6, 2007